A Valentine’s Reflection: The Relationship You Live In Every Day

Self-love is often spoken about as an idea, a concept, or a goal to reach. But in lived experience, it is something far simpler and far more demanding than that.

Self-love is a relationship.

It is the longest and most intimate relationship you will ever have. It is with you every day, through everything. There is no stepping away from it, no pause button, no clean slate on a Monday morning. Like any relationship, it is shaped by how you listen, how present you are, and how compassionately you respond to what you meet.

This kind of self-love is not indulgence. It is not constant softness or endless reassurance. It is not about pretending everything is fine when it is not. Instead, it is the steady practice of staying in relationship with yourself: choosing honesty over avoidance, steadiness over self-abandonment.

In yoga, we practise this not through force, but through attention.

Through noticing rather than pushing.

Through responding rather than ignoring.

Through learning when to soften, and when to gently challenge ourselves.

Asana becomes a place where this relationship can be explored and repaired. A place to listen to the body rather than override it. A place to feel sensation without immediately judging it. A place to practise being on our own side, even when things feel uncomfortable or unfamiliar.

This isn’t an invitation to become someone different.

It’s an invitation to sit alongside yourself exactly as you are. To remember what it feels like to be loyal to your own experience. To stay present rather than turning away. To practise the quiet, radical act of self-companionship.

If Valentine’s Day marks anything here, let it be this: a recommitment to the relationship you live inside every day.

Journal/Thinking Prompt

In my relationship with myself, I am willing to practise…

For example:

– speaking to myself more gently

– listening before reacting

– staying present when things feel uncomfortable

– offering myself the same patience I offer others

Take your time. Let the answer arrive slowly.

As always, this work is not about perfection. It is about showing up, again and again, with a little more honesty and a little more care.

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Valentine Gifts from Me to You

I adore this poem by John Roedel, I think it perfectly encapsulates the journey of self-acceptance and self-love. If you have a spare few minutes, I would love you to read it.

You might like to listen to this self-love meditation, which I recorded in class on 14th February 2026.

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Thank you for being here, for practising with me, and for bringing your whole selves to the mat and beyond.

With love, Vicki xx